


Empty

by sashimiontoast



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: M/M, Major Spoilers, based on manga
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-15
Updated: 2018-09-15
Packaged: 2019-07-12 13:50:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15996506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sashimiontoast/pseuds/sashimiontoast
Summary: a letter from eiji to ash.





	Empty

**Author's Note:**

> warning this is sad and THERE ARE SPOILERS.

_ Ash, _

 

_ How are you? _

Are you well? 

 

 

Are you happy? Is your troubled mind finally at ease? I remember how you were always so eager to sleep.

I see you sometimes. I see you in my kitchen or even down the road. I see your face, your emerald eyes and blonde hair.

Sometimes you’re smiling at me, your eyes glimmering. Other times you’re looking down, with that stoic expression you always put on in front of others.

 

And when I see you, I run to you. But _no_  -it's never really you. Just someone with the same colour hair as you, or someone who stood the same way as you.

Or no one at all.

 

_ I miss you.  _

 

Far too much.

 

It's unfair that you had to go so quickly. 

Didn't I promise to stay with you forever? What happened to that?… _Why did you leave...._

 

 

 

 

 

I look through your photos. The ones i took at that time, the time that I wish iI could go back to. The time when there were guns down our throats and criminals out for our blood. The time when it seemed like hell had broken lose and all the demons were chasing after us. But even so, I would die a million times to go back. _Madness_ , isn’t it?

I would go back to that time because even though everything was so difficult, it was a little easier because I had you by my side. Making you smile and laugh was all that really mattered.

I remember when you would cry into my arms when your burdens would grow too heavy. I miss running my hands through your soft hair and whispering to you to calm your unsettled mind.

You were so damn beautiful. I’ve always wanted to tell you that, yet I didn’t know how. I only realised until it was too late.

We wanted to go to Japan together. I wanted to show you my home, and family and so much more. I wanted to take you away from the misery of a life you lived.

 

We had plans, Ash. Maybe they were unrealistic- but they were there. We had dreams. And now they're just going to rot underground, all because you had to go so so early.

 

I think about you in every breath I take. There is not one day I don’t remember you.

_ Sometimes I wonder how life would be if you were still here.  _

 

I wonder if you’re really watching over me like everyone says you are. 

 

Or maybe you’re just rotting underground. 

 

 

 

I don’t know anymore. All I know is that you’re gone.

And I can’t do anything to get you back this time.

 

Just like your name...  _Just like ash, you floated away from the flames of the hell that you once lived in._

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I told you I was going to go crazy if I lost you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_ I’m almost there. _

 

 

 

_ Eiji. _


End file.
